There are many joys that come with having 5 kids. I suppose one of the benefits is having the opportunity to learn, grow and become a better father along the way. I guess that sucks for the older children who were forced to endure the twists and turns of a young parent trying to learn on the fly.
As this year ends and a new one begins I hope to bring more balance into my lyfe especially in the area of parenting. My oldest daughter turns 17 in four days and I find myself reflecting on the job I've done preparing her for the world. I guess time will tell.
I know that no matter how hard I try I can't save her from herself.
I can't protect her from this world or reshuffle the deck that's dealt.
I realize in my efforts to teach her I lost sight of the big picture. I confronted every issue in the name of consistency and by doing so I became inconsistent with the love I showed. I could easily shift the blame to another name, bringing my past into focus but the truth doesn't always bring justice.
I find solace in my regrets
Because that means there were attempts
I bare the responsibility alone
I am the Captain of this ship
So in the coming weeks or months
As she prepares to leave the nest
I did the best that I knew
And what I knew was nothing less
Just because I tried...doesn't mean I passed every test
I learn as I go and change it up as I raise the rest
I love her
But it's time to let her go
Let her spread her wings as I watch from the window
Lord she's yours so I release her to your care
Help her weather the storms
Let her know that you're right there
And every decision or choice should not be made without prayer
Lord I pray
That all my wrongs you'll make right
All the mistakes I made she won't repeat in her lyfe
Help me to continue to grow
So I can stand through this long fight
And in the process becoming a better FATHER.....I just might! By Unique